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We atter goot the Labrex Change
On Satdee arter three:
The wyliss said as ow we ad
Oose names begin wi V.
The kids ad all gone pallis, so
At quarter arter two
I guz up Rectry Roard and gits
Be’ind the littlist coo.

It dintek lung afore I gits
Right through the outside yard
An ata desk a gal said “Where’s
Your I-den-titty Card?”
“Well, if I ent f’gotit now,”
I sez – I worrup set;
I dinnarf feel a fool, I come
All over in a sweat.

“Oh, no I ent,” I sez, “It’s ere
Beside me sweets pints book.”
The gal, a posh young thing she were,
Said “Yent signed ere yet, look.”
“An did I oughter, miss?” I sez;
“Oh yes, it sez so, see;”
So wither pen I fills it up —
Matilda Mary V.

“Now ayon war work, please?” she sez;
I sez “War work, megal?
Sh’ think I am wi’ my two kids
An two young vacs as well,
An my ol man in Libiyer
An ousekeeping t’ do,
An spending arf the bloomin day
In scrounging in a coo.”

“Awright,” she sez, “Thas quite awright,
Yawron war work I see,
For looking arter kids is most
Important, Mrs. V.
But then, y’ know, we atter arst,
Accus it all depens;
If yent on war work yatter jine
The Waafs or Ats or Wrens.”

A bitter card she gimme then,
An orf I guz back um
An meks meself a cupper tea
Afore the nippers come.
An then I writta line tair Tom
An toldim where I’d bin,
An said I’d nearly jined the Ats —
That woonarf mekim grin.

Ike nearim sayin “My Old Dutch
Ud mek a Nat awrright,
But woont er khaki uniform
Fit round ‘er blooming tight?”
I wondow lung it teks t’ git
Ome from the Middle East?
Coo, woonit be awright if Tom
Got ‘ome for Rusdin Feast?

R.W.N.

We have to go to the Labour Exchange
On Saturday after three
The wireless said that we had
Whose names begin with V.
The kids had all gone to the Palace, so
At a quarter past two
I went up Rectory Road and got
Behind the smallest queue.

It didn't take long before I got
Right through the outside yard
And at a desk a girl said "Where's
Your identity card?"
"Well, I have forgotten it now"
I said - I was upset;
I didn't half feel a fool, I came
All over in a sweat.

"Oh, no I haven't," I said, "It's here
With my sweets points book."
The girl, a 'posh' young thing
Said "You haven't signed here yet, look."
"And did I ought to, miss?" I said;
"Oh yes, it says so, see;"
So with her pen I filled it up
Matilda Mary V.

"Now are you on war work, please?" she said;
I said "War work, my girl?
Should think I am with my two kids
And two young evacuees as well,
And my old man (husband) in Libya
And housekeeping to do,
And spending half the day
In scrounging in a queue.

"Allright," she said, "That's quite allright,
You are on war work I see,
For looking after kids is most
Important, Mrs. V.
But then, you know, we have to ask,
Because it all depends;
If you're not on war work you have to join
The WAAFS or ATS or WRENS.

A bit of card she gave me then,
And off I go back home
And makes myself a cup of tea
Before the kiddies come.
And then I wrote a line to our Tom
And told him where I'd been,
And said I'd nearly joined the ATS -
That would make him grin.

I can hear him saying "My Old Dutch
Would make an AT allright,
But wouldn't her khaki uniform
Fit round her very tight?"
I wonder how long it takes to get
Home from the Middle East?
Oh, wouldn't it be allright if Tom
Got home for Rushden Feast?